Year 2008 is a sucky year with so many deaths and separation. It seems to be a lesson to remind me that death and separation are inevitable part of life. So to treasure the people around you.

I believe that putting in your 100% will translate to show how much you treasure a person. However it seems like this "logic" is flawed. Putting in your 100% is nothing if not reciprocated. Putting in your 100% will only serve to hurt you more, and create unneccessary delusion. Creating confusion, uncertainty and pain.

So to prevent the same thing from happening, should I adopt an indifferent attitude? Should I just put in 75% or less of my effort instead of all?

I thought I can accept it coolly. Yet another delusion created by myself. But I believed I can overcome it. It's not the first time but I sure hope it's the last time.